The chances are good that your purpose differs from those held by your father and grandfathers. Scholars say that fathers of previous generations saw their purpose as financially supporting their families and providing discipline to their children. Some saw themselves as leaders and role models for their families, especially regarding religious instruction. Inherent in these missions is a sense of authority, which could sometimes become authoritarianism— “the enforcement of strict obedience to authority at the expense of personal freedom,” as the dictionary says.

As a group, today’s fathers see their role somewhat differently.

Women in the workforce have steadily increased for over a century. Today, roughly as many women as men are working for pay—though men still tend to make considerably more money than their female coworkers, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics.

What does this have to do with purpose? As women made more money, men’s participation at home started climbing. Today’s dads spend much more time with their children than their fathers. Moreover, the United States has become increasingly diverse. Immigrants have brought new conceptions of fatherhood to America. Fathers of color face challenges that shape their sense of purpose.

As a result of these developments, many fathers today add “nurturing” to their purpose, along with “providing.” In a discussion I hosted on my Facebook wall, several dads said they intended to be better than their fathers—and to raise kids who would be better than them. What they meant by this, more often than not, was to be physically and emotionally present in their children’s lives.